UK2.XYZ NEWS

Trump announces deal for Russian diesel as Zelensky criticises 'gift to Putin'

Ukraine's president said allowing Russia to sell petroleum products would prolong a war that must be ended.

NI secretary to ban the Drumcree parade

The parade has led to a stand-off between Orangemen and nationalist residents of the Garvaghy Road in Portadown lasting almost two weeks.

Early release scheme prisoner jailed days after leaving

Michael Bogle had said outside prison last week that "people like me" should not be jailed "for a long time".

Commentator Katie Zacharia picked as new White House press secretary

The conservative commentator currently works as a communications adviser at Trump Media & Technology Group.

Watch: Can the Fort Hood shooter's execution be livestreamed?

Rules on the recording and filming of executions differ between state, federal and military regulations.

Polanski vows to stay on as Green leader as he faces criticism after by-election defeat

Jewish Greens' leader has said Polanski should resign in the wake of a Zionism row and by-election defeat.

Trump says Russia will immediately supply '300,000 tons of diesel' - with millions more to follow

Donald Trump says Russia will provide "the American and global marketplace" with nearly five million US tons of diesel after a phone call with Vladimir Putin.

US unveils sanctions on ICC in move court condemns as 'assault on rule of law'

Several member states of the international tribunal, including the UK, say they "strongly disagree" with the sanctions.

JD Vance casts doubt on firing squad execution and says he will not watch it

The planned execution of Nidal Hasan by firing squad would be the first military execution in more than 60 years.

Early release prisoner commits startling crime spree 24 hours after walking free

A registered sex offender has embarked on a wild shoplifting spree only 24 hours after being released from jail in the government's early release scheme

Donald Trump didn’t win the Nobel Peace Prize again, and now everyone is laughing at him – including this year’s actual recipient

Noted peace advocate Donald Trump has long coveted the world’s most prestigious diplomatic prize – the Nobel Peace Prize. Indeed, so desperate is he to have a Nobel medal that he accepted another’s winner’s sloppy seconds back in January. Now the 2026 winner has been announced – and, again, FIFA Peace Prize laureate Donnie was […]

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Hurricane Isaias closes in on US Gulf Coast

Hurricane Isaias is set to make landfall along the Alabama and Florida coasts on Friday night in the US.

US immigration officials defend ICE agents who shot man in same car as child

Oscar Bergal, the 28-year-old man, survived the shooting and is now being held at a detention facility outside of New York, officials said.

Mental health charity leaves graffiti on city streets - 'people need reminding'

Special messages have been popping up across London as part of a new campaign to get Brits talking.

Lib Dem MP quits frontbench job over Ed Davey's leadership

Deputy party leader Daisy Cooper says "the vast majority of our MPs support Ed... and are furious at this distraction."

Flydubai hijacker planned to crash aircraft in 9/11-inspired attack, UAE says

The alleged hijacker of a flydubai plane planned to crash into Israel's Ben Gurion airport, according to a senior Emirati official.

Tornado rips through Sicilian town and city

Dramatic footage shows huge tornado moving through Marsala and Petrosino, causing damage to buildings and cars.

Watch: 'I am Jane Doe' protests across US call for end to sexual violence

Protests against sexual violence took place across more than 40 US states on 8 October.

Watch: 'This has never happened before!' Olivia Colman on viral Wicker memes

Olivia Colman stars alongside Alexander Skarsgård in the upcoming film Wicker which has prompted many memes.

Verstappen on sprint pole after another settings issue

Red Bull's Max Verstappen beats Mercedes driver George Russell to sprint pole at the Singapore Grand Prix.

Two Latvian men bailed after arrest at RAF base

Two Latvian men who were arrested on suspicion of trespassing at an RAF base in Cambridgeshire have been bailed.

Prize-winning image which sparked backlash was AI-generated, Nikon rules

The camera-maker says it is now re-evaluating the rules and procedures of its Small World in Motion contest.

Watch: Who is Nobel Peace Prize winner Navi Pillay?

BBC correspondent Joe Inwood explains how Pillay's childhood in South Africa led her to become a driving force in international law from Myanmar to Gaza.

Michelle O'Neill invited for police interview over Garvaghy Road protest

Michelle O'Neill says she has received a letter inviting her for a police interview in relation to her involvement in a Garvaghy Road protest.

Bank cashier outed by holiday photos after stealing £13k is ordered to pay back money

Kelly Kershaw stole from vulnerable customers to fund a safari in Africa and a trip to Paris.

Dad and son remain critical after masked men attack

Leicestershire Police say the attack at the family home appeared "completely unprovoked".

Man who murdered wife and hid body in freezer while contacting escorts jailed for life

A man has been sentenced to life in prison after murdering his wife with a hammer and keeping her body in a freezer while he emptied their bank accounts and contacted escorts.

Widdecombe suspect had 'particular hostility to Reform', court told

Kerry is charged with the murder of the 78-year-old former Conservative minister and Reform UK spokeswoman.

I've got my own questions on Man City case - Carrick

Manchester United boss Michael Carrick says he was personally affected by the Manchester City case which has seen the club found guilty of breaching Premier League financial rules and still has questions about the matter.

This BBC News man’s saucy breakfast time pun didn’t land as he’d hoped and maybe it’s just us but we had proper tears

It’s not BBC business reporter Peter Ruddick’s saucy breakfast time pun that makes this so glorious – well, it is – but it’s the fact that it doesn’t land quite as he presumably hoped. That and the awkward pause and basically everything that follows is just brilliant. Maybe it’s just been a long week, but […]

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Where Tyson Fury vs Anthony Joshua tickets are still on sale despite selling out

Tyson Fury vs Anthony Joshua tickets sold out in 40 minutes but fans can still book seats for the fight in Cardiff through one official retailer.

Northern Ireland secretary says he will ban Drumcree parade

Northern Ireland Secretary Sir Chris Bryant said he is to ban the Drumcree parade.

What reception awaits Man City at Anfield?

Bus welcomes, banners and flags expected as Man City head to Liverpool on Sunday for their first game since they were found guilty of breaching Premier League rules.

Donald Trump just gave Elon Musk the National Medal of Science and it wasn’t just the timing that sent people scurrying down the rabbit hole

Two of the richest gas bags in the universe have reunited and it feels so… icky. Elon Musk and Donald Trump have had a complicated dynamic. They are the best of friends, they are the worst of friends. But one thing is for sure: Trump will cozy up to anyone who can help him during […]

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Widdecombe murder 'politically and ideologically motivated'

Ann Widdecombe's murder is alleged to have been "politically and ideologically motivated", a court has heard.

The US will livestream an execution by firing squad and the Mariana Trench isn’t low enough for how far Pete Hegseth just sank

Just when you thought the Trump Administration couldn’t get any more barbaric, Pete Hegseth pops up in your feed. The man who is so insecure that he changed his job title from Secretary of Defense to Secretary of War has put all of his deep psychological wounds on full display with his latest announcement. CBS […]

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Anthropic bans users from being 'cruel' to its AI systems

The firm said users can no longer engage in "sustained and needless" abusive behaviour towards the tech.

King pays Andrew's £1.5m repair bill on Royal Lodge

Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor was charged £1.5m in repair and restoration costs after surrendering the lease on the 30-room mansion.

Autism, ADHD and mental health review: What you need to know

It contains big lessons for the NHS, welfare, education and employment policies. What are the key takeaways?

Someone trolled Brits for complaining about the heat now it’s finally got chilly and these A++ replies will make you proud to be British

It was a long, hot summer – a very long, very hot summer – but now it’s October it’s actually just a little bit chilly. Like it should be, obviously. But it was perhaps inevitable that someone would poke fun at people who complained about the heat now it’s finally a thing of the past. […]

The post Someone trolled Brits for complaining about the heat now it’s finally got chilly and these A++ replies will make you proud to be British appeared first on The Poke.

Ringleader of 'zoo sadist' monkey abuse network jailed

Warning: This article contains descriptions of violence and cruelty to animals

From the workplace to pop culture - why how we view women's anger is changing

Studies suggest women are getting angrier, but are they just more open about it?

Biohacker Bryan Johnson claims AI will help humans live past 500 and 'may never die'

Millionaire biohacker Bryan Johnson claims AI will help humans live to 500 by creating 'self-driving' health systems that stop or reverse ageing

People have been sharing the unspoken rules of corporate survival – 17 sneaky ways to get ahead in the office

If you’ve ever worked in an office, you’ll know that it’s a thunderdome of sociopathic behaviour. But if you know how to play your cards, it’s possible to survive if not thrive. To find out how to navigate the hostile hot desks of white collar workplaces, u/Prodesse1994 put the following question to office survivors over […]

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Wardy's wagers: Bash bookies with bumper 40/1 bet builder on Liverpool v Man City

Our man reckons City will wipe the floor with Liverpool and also says you don't need hypnosis to see time is up for Green Party leader Zack Polanski and Strictly contestant Shaun Wright Phillips

The White House confidently declared it would establish a ‘permanent presence’ on the moon and the mockery that followed will restore your faith in humanity

Donald Trump is facing a mauling in the November midterms with multiple issues piling up in his in-tray, many of them entirely of the President’s own making. But forget about soaring fuel prices and the cost of living crisis and the war with Iran that he started and now cannot end, Trump’s White House has […]

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Drought declared in Yorkshire

Drought has been declared in Yorkshire due to a lack of spring and summer rainfall, the Environment Agency has said.

People have been sharing the ‘funniest or weirdest’ things they’ve seen on a train – 21 spectacles that almost make rail travel worth the money

Train travel in the UK regularly gets a panning, and it definitely has its downsides as it is very expensive, often crowded and the sandwiches are terrible. But on the plus side, it’s good for the environment and, occasionally, also good for a laugh. Over on the AskUK subreddit, user SirSebastianRasputin shared their experience of […]

The post People have been sharing the ‘funniest or weirdest’ things they’ve seen on a train – 21 spectacles that almost make rail travel worth the money appeared first on The Poke.

A Maga was asked to name one thing – anything! – that had got better since Trump’s return and it didn’t speak volumes, it bellowed them

To the world now of the Good Liars, that brilliant duo shining a hilarious (and devastating) light on the state of America right now. And in this instance it’s the great Jason Selvin asking these Magas whether their life is better than it was when Donald Trump returned to the White House. And if so, […]

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‘What completely normal UK thing are you embarrassingly bad at?’ – 22 people who can’t even queue properly

As people who live in the UK, there are certain things we’re supposed to be naturally good at, like standing patiently in a line, drinking enough tea to sink a pedalo, and being passive-aggressive. But what if we’re not good at those things? Have we failed at being a Brit? They’ve been discussing this on […]

The post ‘What completely normal UK thing are you embarrassingly bad at?’ – 22 people who can’t even queue properly appeared first on The Poke.

Our 25 Favourite Funny Tweets of the Week

We’re well into autumn, and rapidly approaching the return to Greenwich Mean Time and the darker evenings it brings. It can be a little on the gloomy side, and we need to grab all the comfort we can – from big bowls of porridge or stew, getting the woollens out of storage, or just sitting […]

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James Blunt on Celebrity Traitors is a total turn-off for this particular viewer and Blunt’s A++ comeback was simply brilliant

We’re big fans of James Blunt on these pages as regular readers (come on, we know you’re out there!) will already know, so naturally we’re rooting for him on the rather fabulous new series of Celebrity Traitors. I am crying 😭😭😭 #CelebrityTraitors https://t.co/fjgnzKJeda — sᴜᴘᴇʀ ᴛᴠ (@superTV247) October 8, 2026 Except – hard to believe […]

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Survivor of US Army shooting supports gunman's execution but questions livestream

Alonzo Lunsford tells the BBC the punishment befits the crime but he has some doubts whether the public should be able to watch it.

I've been with my boyfriend for two years and don't know his salary

Talking about salary, spending habits and debt can be some of dating's trickier conversations.

An American ‘freedom aficionado’ took aim at Britain’s gun laws and these A++ replies will make you proud to be British

It all started with an entirely innocent post by the good people of @NoContextBrits about Americans’ fondness for boiling water with pretty much anything other than a kettle. Fun fact: 90% of Americans have no idea what this is. https://t.co/iXdFkrcJYz — No Context Brits (@NoContextBrits) October 6, 2026 Except one particular American appears to take […]

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Donald Trump declared people “the enemy” for saying AI instead of SI, and Orwell entered the chat – 23 people calling out the newspeak

There’s nothing Donald Trump likes more than a good executive order. It means he doesn’t have to get his hare-brained schemes past Congress, and the new rules can run at least until a judge declares them illegal, and he’s exhausted the appeal process. A recent executive order changed the term Artificial Intelligence to Super Intelligence, […]

The post Donald Trump declared people “the enemy” for saying AI instead of SI, and Orwell entered the chat – 23 people calling out the newspeak appeared first on The Poke.

30 funniest things people are saying about the absolute joy that is Celebrity Traitors right now

It was time for the third episode of the new series of Celebrity Traitors on Thursday and we’re not sure this needs saying but just in case it does – spoiler alert! Twitter was all over it as you might imagine and we’ve read every single thing people said about it so you don’t have […]

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‘Cruelty’ to Anthropic’s chatbot Claude could lead to a ban, if you were wondering whether the tech bros have drunk their own Kool-Aid – 26 savage takedowns

Today’s episode of Silicon Valley is brought to you by the letters W, T and F, and stars the ghost of Isaac Asimov, who first created the ethical framework for robotics. AI (not SI) company Anthropic has updated its terms of service for the use of its chatbot Claude, with an eyebrow-raising addition to the […]

The post ‘Cruelty’ to Anthropic’s chatbot Claude could lead to a ban, if you were wondering whether the tech bros have drunk their own Kool-Aid – 26 savage takedowns appeared first on The Poke.

Right-wingers getting prickly over hedgehogs replacing Churchill on bank notes must be today’s funniest overreaction

Last year, the Bank of England announced that they would be allowing the public to vote on a theme to replace historical figures on banknotes. In March, they revealed that the winning theme would be British wildlife. Aw. Cute! The British love animals, so what could possibly go wrong? Oh! It says it all that […]

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JD Vance’s dictionary-busting redefinition of Socialism just put the satirists out of business – 21 epic side-eyes

JD Vance is the safety net in the event of anything incapacitating Donald Trump – such as a particularly tricky slope, an eagle visiting the Oval Office, or McDonald’s DC closing for refurbishment. If, like us, you’re already dubious that the VP is up to the job, this clip will absolutely not reassure you. Q: […]

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Workers making football shirts for some of world's biggest clubs earn 86p-an-hour

Investigators found Cambodians knocking out up to 700-a-day in 35C heat under threat of verbal abuse for missing targets while prices of genuine shirts explode

People shared the mad stuff that happened at their school that simply wouldn’t fly today – 17 eye-opening hijinks from back in the day

Schools have changed so much in recent years that to many readers they probably seem unrecognisable. The differences go beyond the lack of black boards though. The dynamics between pupils and teachers have fundamentally changed too. Redditor u/shitthrower wanted to find out more, so they put the following question to r/AskUK: ‘What mad stuff happened […]

The post People shared the mad stuff that happened at their school that simply wouldn’t fly today – 17 eye-opening hijinks from back in the day appeared first on The Poke.

Donald Trump just promised every senior citizen in Texas $100 right before the midterm elections and people didn’t know whether to laugh or cry

You get what you pay for. And in the case of Texas voters, they’re about to find out how much “over $100” gets them if they take Donald Trump up on his offer. Trump continues to tour the country in a last ditch effort to get his Maga friends re-elected in the upcoming midterms so […]

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'American Covid' ravages NHS hospitals – all we know about new brutal strain

As a new 'American Covid' variant fuels a surge in UK hospital admissions, here is what you need to know about the symptoms, NHS impact and pandemic risk

Charles Bronson's maddest moments – naked butter riot, custard protest and 'turkey' hostages

Ahead of his ninth parole hearing, notorious prisoner Charles Bronson’s violent past, including hostage-taking, rooftop protests and brawls, has been brought back to light

Inside Andrew's luxury Marsh Farm life as police admit searches were 'unlawful'

Any impression we may have had that the exiled former prince Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor is living an uncomfortable life appears to have been dispelled, with claims he's now "turned a corner"

Ex-teacher left homeless with all her bags as council slammed for 'zero empathy'

Former teacher Sofia Cox was left stranded on Liverpool's streets without housing benefits after local services refused to accommodate her due to a lack of local links

Russia may have 'weaponised more deadly diseases than Black Death'

US State Department claims Vladimir Putin has secretly kept Soviet biowarfare labs and his scientists may have tampered with other illnesses including typhus, smallpox and anthrax

Sir Kevin Sinfield says seeing him knighted would have had late pal Rob Burrow 'laughing'

The rugby star who has raised £12m to combat motor neurone disease says Rob would have found it funny seeing him go through the sword-on-the-shoulder ceremony but would have been 'enormously proud'

Daddy long legs are invading UK homes to mate - act now to keep them out

UK residents dread the arrival of daddy longs ever each autumn and once again they are set to invade our homes across the country as crane fly mating season peaks

Lecturer, 33, killed couple in head-on crash on way home from boozy Christmas party

Sophie Hynd has drank cider, Prosecco, and maybe a Guinness shot, before she got behind the wheel to drive home

Moment student's Dexter copycat 'kill room' murder of sex worker revealed in lie to cops

WARNING, DISTRESSING CONTENT: Student Benjamin Day admitted killing sex worker Maria Saceanu after luring her to his Dexter-style 'kill room' as footage of his lies to police have been revealed

Royal GP found dead in home with 'children present' as husband in court over her murder

Mark Cain has appeared in court for the first time since he was charged with the murder of his wife Dr Hannah Cain, who was found dead at her home with "children present in the property at the time"

Royal Mail places up to 2,500 jobs at risk in 'significant transformation'

Royal Mail has announced plans for an organisational review that is expected to see a loss of up to 2,500 head office and support function jobs by the end of 2027

Andy Burnham set to make major benefits announcement as one scheme 'not fit for purpose'

A government minister has promised disabled people will not be forced to take vouchers over cash, but refused to rule out future PIP benefit spending cuts

Daughter's secret CCTV captures step-dad's 'disgusting' abuse to terminally ill mum

WARNING, DISTRESSING CONTENT: Step-dad Keith Foster admitted a campaign of Liverpool domestic abuse against his terminally ill wife, including urinating into her water bottles, as he's spared prison

Nurse suspended over 'sexual contact with patient and booking hotel for sex on day off'

Keary-Erin Carrington has admitted to a number of allegations involving a patient, including sexual contact on University Hospital Southampton NHS Foundation Trust's premises and telling him she loved him

Proud cuck who loves watching girlfriend romp with other men says he is 'ultimate feminist'

Josh Vow has defended his non-monogamous relationship with his girlfriend Jade, calling himself the 'ultimate feminist' who champions women's equality and freedom

Harry and Meghan 'ready to eat humble pie' with grovelling apology to Royals

Prince Harry and Meghan Markle are reportedly planning a sensational apology to the Royals over their bombshell Oprah interview in a bid to end the family feud

Mega fly-tip clean-up to cost taxpayers an 'absolute fortune' as it 'isn't Jack the Lad'

Hinckley and Bosworth Borough Council has approved up to £1.3m to clear an illegal waste dump off the A47 between Hinckley and Earl Shilton. No money has yet been spent, and the council is seeking government help and recovery of costs from those responsible.

RAF Fairford investigation update as terror cops arrest seventh man as six on bail

A 22-year-old British man was arrested in London today on suspicion of terror offences related to the suspected RAF Fairford terror plot, Counter Terrorism Policing said.

Brit dad of boy, 2, who fell from hotel window, in tears as moment will 'haunt him'

Joshua Foster was seen in tears at Paphos District Court as details of the case were read out regarding how his two-yea-old son fell from a window at a hotel in Cyprus

Does Zack Polanski Face A Leadership Crisis?

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Brad Pitt stars as a tank commander on a dangerous mission in WWII

Film following a battle-hardened US tank crew taking on the enemy’s brutal rearguard action

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